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I wish that
I could pack up my bags
and take ’em downtown to the train station
because I keep drifting away
and I get a little sea-sick
when I see it’s
Gonna rain

I thought I saw you
I thought I saw you standing there
staring back at me
but when I called out your name
I felt ashamed it wasn’t you.

So now I’m breaking myself down
for not thinking about you ’til now.
I’ve got a thousand reminders in my pocket but somehow
you remain to be the spare change that I hardly ever take out.

I ain’t never forget ’bout how I was s’pose to spend that
summer with you teaching me how to cook
that Southern Soul-Food culture
Especially when I’m standing in the kitchen, these days 
and don’t know how to turn on the got-damn oven.

See, I got you in my recipe but the
ingredients ain’t all here
I’m missing you next to me
and got an extra tablespoon of tears
If I could just take back this
savory called Thyme
I’d marinate you with my love and we’d be
soaking in sunshine!

I wish that
I could pack up my bags…

I hate the taste of raindrops
when fallin’ from my eyes
Oh, how I wish there was some other way to
keep them all inside
I hold my breath tight when driving
past cemetaries
Thinking to myself, life couldn’t be
anymore unnecessary
Because I only complain
’bout how I come into pain
how I feel my heartache
and how I’m sinking, sinking, sinking insane.

All I really know, know, know
is that I’m feeling unworthy
these painkillers can’t be working
’cause I’m still hurting
and I’m haunted in my dreams.

I hope that this is just a season of sorrow
soon to pass
I keep wishing for tomorrow to be my last
so I can come clean of this horrible feeling of

sad.

My eyes sting and roll into my frown
as I try to imitate the late, great James Brown
and beg, “Please, please, please”
bring my loved ones back to me.

Every time I lose, loneliness finds me.

Britta B.

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2 Comments

  1. Beautiful….

  2. how are you?
    visit me to claim 3 awards in my post…
    make a contribution to poets rally today, have fun!
    this piece is stunning..keep it up.

    bless you!


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