I took my time writing this because
the words didn’t want to exist.
They wanted to sting,
go off into shadows
fall down somewhere and die.
We pulled into each other on the brightest
day of the greatest summer of my life.
When your eyes caught mine
I sneak-peeked in like a movie preview
and saw a ghost.
So I whispered to where the sun sets in Spain
“Let him find his sol (soul).”
Por que, tu eres la solana de mi alma.
For a long, exaggerated moment
you and I were ‘loved and found.’
Until the flash of our greatest desires before
we desired each other reappeared and
nothing mattered compared to what mattered.
So finally it resonated, breeding acceptance and now
we move slowly, separate ways together
from the place we learned
there’s nothing more to gain
unless we lose everything.
But you know better than I do;
Nothing is ever truly lost, it transforms.
Take what was ours hours ago
with you as will I…
And when I begged for one last embrace
you leaned in ever so gently that it carved
the best of us out like a plastic spoon bending
from the force of excited hands digging into
a fresh carton of chocolatechipcookiedough ice cream.
I was afraid you were in a rush
so I let go first
but not without noticing the warmth of your
hands cradling the curves of my torso.
You rubbed your palms against me as if
you could pick up three more wishes.
What else did you wish for?
Turned my eyes from you
before I could study the way you walked away.
Took matters into my own hands
let the salty wet matter drip into my own hands
reminding the world no pain is waterproof.
It was our last goodbye. Until we meet again, transformed.